Feeling the extreme pressure of the highly noncompetitive Quad Plus March Madness free throw contest, Reigning champion, Steve Pioppo resorted to questionable ethical tactics to steal another championship. The crowd let out an enthusiastic applause since the stress of being hounded to shoot baskets was now behind them. Mark Braasch was commented after the event. “Steve likes to play dirty, making people take their turns when their hands were still slippery from eating the fantastic food.” Mark then went on to compare the win to using bumpers in bowling and hitting home runs off a tee.
Nevertheless, Steve Pioppo now joins the ranks of Barry Bonds, Sammy Sosa, the 1919 White Sox and Roger Clemens as true heroes* of the sports world.
When asked how he felt about the win, Mr. Pioppo smiled graciously and then was reported saying something pretentious and obnoxious.